White T-shirts and Black T-shirts

Discuss general gang topics that are not place specific or touch on multiple places.
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Soldier
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White T-shirts and Black T-shirts

Unread post by Soldier » February 4th, 2005, 10:52 pm

I came back from being out in the field and I read over a lot of these posts. Some of them are really quite funny. "How many sizes too big do bangers in your area wear their white tees? What about their black ones?" It seems like instead of this place being what the website orginally was (an educational tool for the public about a very real threat) it's simply a place for people that are infatuated with the lifestyle to dip their hands in it without taking the plunge. To most of you, it's almost a "how to be real 101 manual." That's really sad. One of you asked an interesting question on one of the topics. Some of you might know what I am talking about, I really don't feel like finding it. Somebody asked a member what he finds precious in life. The thread was locked for being off-topic, and the fool never answered it. If anything, nothing could have been further on the subject. What do you people treasure? How can so many of you be so insecure in who you are, bangers or otherwise, that it matters what the fuck some net-bitch thinks of you? Has he walked in your shoes? Or is what scares you the fact that your 400 dollar shoes are really not that hard to walk in? Do you know what I find precious in life? I haven't posted here too often, most of you probably don't even know or remember me, but I have spent a very long time watching what you all write to each other. So in the hopes of maybe, just maybe, reaching some of you, I'll put my most guarded possession: my personal life, on display for all of you. Just once. Do you believe me? Do you care? Maybe, maybe not. Take from it what you will. I was born in Hayward, california, lived in east oakland for a long while, then moved to East LA. I've lived in group homes, been to YA, and soaked up the west coast cali gangster life-style. The gang doesn't matter; it's not the point. I've committed and witnessed acts of violence and brutality that I wish I hadn't. I've caused my mom more pain than a woman should have to bear from her eldest son, and she has done the same to me. I've cooked and sold drugs, robbed homes, stabbed and shot, been shot at in a car with my ex (who left me), tried to kill my stepdad, the list goes on. I've lost my brother, who hates me, and every day I look at a little cross necklace he gave me once many years ago and try not to cry for what I did to him by living so selfishly. I was introduced to all this by a muscle-bound tatted-up mexican ex-con uncle from east LA who suddenly disappeared a few years ago. But the decisions I made were my alone. I am also a devout catholic, if you all are interested in contradiction. I stopped selling drugs to join the Army, losing my sole source of income, proceeded to starve over a period of a month and weighed 105 pounds when I got on the plane. I joined the Army to be an infantry soldier, the guy that fights the wars that other people watch on tv, for which I have an intense burning pride. Not, mind you, to escape what I was, because I made the decision beforehand. It was because that was what I always wanted to do, and that means more to me. I was sent to mental health and diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder, normally found in Iraq combat veterans, shortly after joining, and took zanex for awhile before I gave it up. I prefer to do it my own way. My job is hard physically and mentally, and I never get the creature comforts others take for granted. You know what I find precious in life? A filipina woman I met here in South Korea that I am going to ask to marry me before I leave in 19 days, scared to death she might say no. A heater that we finally get started long enough to warm our hands up so they don't get frostbite, right before pulling our 2 hour shifts of guard at 3 in the morning in -25 degree weather. Sleep. 3 meals a day. My family. A few close friends. Being able to see the stars at night and know that a loved one I haven't been with in years sees them somewhere too. God, and my ever-struggling faith in him. My dog. My family moved to Kentucky to escape the whole city scene, and my next duty station is fort campbell, located in - you guessed it - Kentucky. I have 6-8 months to make peace with them before I go to Iraq, not knowing if I may come home or not. I train to kill people every day, and you know what I find most precious? Life. All of you, and your grand or pathetic little arguements, desires, and dreams. I am not even going to attempt to try and say I have had it the worst, or you guys haven't. Every man endures his own struggle. But please try and understand that some things in life are more precious than others. Some things are more precious than others, and I firmly believe that a triple sized tee and a blue or red flag or some vato mad-dogging you on Florence St. is pretty low on that list. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being informed, knowing your subject. But learn it and move on, don't get caught up in the petty. Try to find out what's really important. I don't know what I hope to achieve by this post, but maybe I'll get lucky and it will touch one of you dumbasses and make you look at things a little differently. The tree of change starts as a seed, so to speak. Take care, I'm out. I have some ring shopping to do. Sincerely, a soldier.

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Re: A question

Unread post by Soldier » February 4th, 2005, 10:57 pm

And yes I am aware this topic is in the wrong section, but people that post in THIS section are probably the ones that most need to read it.

Anonymous20

Re: A question

Unread post by Anonymous20 » February 5th, 2005, 1:35 am

I am thinking about closing down this entire section because I think you are correct that there are those trying to learn what cool by some of the silly idiotic questions they ask. Those are the same people that will never be allowed in the other sections, so if you are wondering why you aint in, read some of your posts. It might mean you need to grow up and see what's important life.

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WhiteBoy
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Re: A question

Unread post by WhiteBoy » February 5th, 2005, 12:53 pm

alanso i do agree with you, but i have noticed that most of the people in the clothing section are still in highschool, so it is just a common middle ground for younger kids to talk about shit that they have in common. thats it.

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WhiteBoy
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Re: A question

Unread post by WhiteBoy » February 5th, 2005, 12:55 pm

but at the same time i do see your point soldier about how kids might be getting on the clothing section and making a list of the clothes they want so that they can look gangster.

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chini
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Re: A question

Unread post by chini » February 5th, 2005, 2:33 pm

Alonso and Everyone: this is a potentially useful place to discuss gang style and symbol as represented by clothing. I also see your point. As it is your www Alonso, do what you feel necessary. Maybe you can just have a Style section, and combine tats, pierces & clothing together, what do you think? The whole thing with cuts on the eyebrows etc can all go to the general style section. Then you'll have all your peas in one pod. I don't know if this will improve the idiot factor lol. Kids will be kids. but you can always try.

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Re: A question

Unread post by chini » February 5th, 2005, 3:03 pm

OK my turn to be a lil off topic, but soldier's letter is very important.

thank you soldier. this website as i understand it was designed to be EDUCATIONAL, that means learning from one another. I read your letter three times to really understand the point you are trying to make and where you are coming from. I can see it's been a long journey, and you are breaking through. I wish you all the luck with your love in your life and your tour in Iraq. Keep us posted.

I hope a lotta kids read your letter and think very carefully about what is going on intheir own lives. Maybe you will touch a few minds, maybe the majority could care less and are stuck where they are, but will remember what you write years from now and think it over. Gang life is becoming more and more some kinda style and something "cool" to do, but do they know what the consequences can be. A lot of these young ones can't even imagine, that the people that they will most f up is themselves as they go in deeper.

They are so impatient for something, anything to happen, that they get trapped in where they are. This is especially true as you know when their entire family for generations haven't or will not learn any other way, and they trap their kids into ganglife. It is my wish that this goes on less and that more options will be open them; I'm not judging you if you are in a gang now, I'm just asking you to think about how you are living your life and where you intend to go with it.

My homegirl C found a way out herself when she left her gang (a serious decision); she got herself into college, and got a full scholarship to law school; let me tell you, she worked her ass off to get to that place, but she got there and her face just shines with happiness each day. You just have to try and try hard.

thanks again soldier; style is wonderful thing, a spice of life, just don't let it get too much further than that, that's my philisophy. OK end of my thoughts/feelings.

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Re: A question

Unread post by BabyJesus » February 6th, 2005, 7:35 pm

i agree witchu 100% i know most of the ppl on dis board come en try ta learn about all of dis BS en be coool en yadayadayada. i know though fer one fact that i aint one of doze ppl. yea i know i live in south la, but i dont take things fer granted. i stay away from trouble, shit i harldy ever go outside jes so i wont get jacced fer somethin, or jumped. i feel fer u cuz ur havin struggles en so am i, but i wont talk about dem. das all i havta say.

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