Do teenage boys like getting in fights?

Unread post by **Christina Marie** » August 12th, 2005, 10:29 am

That "concerned parent" dialogue got me thinking too much!

At about 16-17 my son and his friends all started to get into fights. Like they were looking for it. Hell, like they were hoping for it.

Is this a "normal" stage that teenage boy's go through? I wan't to hear all you're opinion's and view's.

Unread post by **se11** » August 12th, 2005, 11:09 am

if i ever knew my kid was looking for a fight i would say "ok you want a fight, fight me tough guy" once i kicked his ass, then maybe he'd stop. that's the only way people will learn.

Unread post by **Beef** » August 12th, 2005, 1:16 pm

I dont think a lot of them like to...i think a lot of them want to look like they like fighting to make themselves look tough...it seems now a days every one wants to look and act like a tough guy.

Unread post by **Christina Marie** » August 12th, 2005, 3:07 pm

I think it was sort of an adjustment period, like from a boy to a man type of identity crisis thing and it was like their way coming of age. And se11 thats one of the reason's I was a little surprised he was fighting because I have kept him from being exposed to violence in our home. His father was victim of abuse and started beating me and I left him when my boy was a year old. I did'nt want to continue the cycle.

It was a phase and I am glad he grew out of it fast. Now he is too into girls to care about fighting

.

Unread post by **Beef** » August 12th, 2005, 3:19 pm

sorry to hear about your situation....im glad you have pulled through...
i spent some time in long beach...not much, but had some friends there, spent more time in huntington beach though...
How do you like the lbc?

Unread post by **Christina Marie** » August 12th, 2005, 3:46 pm

Not terribly fond of it. I was born and raised here. I would much rather be back east like you (love the fishing!) . My dad is in PA. I already told my son as soon as he is out on his own and stable I am outta here. I think he will probably follow, but ????.

Yeah I am pretty durable

Do you like it better here or back east?

Unread post by **Beef** » August 12th, 2005, 5:41 pm

well im a country boy myself...so there is a big difference from the farm life on the quiet eastern shore of maryland l compared to fast paced socal...I enjoy visiting out there, but my family(mom/pops, etc) are here. But for some reason i have a big fascination of los angeles and its lifestyle. Do you know where the barnes and noble/tower records is in long beach across from the in n out...like near seal beach is...I used to go to that area sometimes...where do you live? east side?
God Bless

Unread post by **NW10** » August 13th, 2005, 2:03 am

Where i come from boys start fighting one another from a young age. when i was 9-10 i started fighting with other kids and it was on a daily basis, and this carried on until we were 17-18. Most fights were just to prove you were the hardest etc...

But fights settle all sorts of disputes and quarrels. On many a time my friends and i have fought over trivial things and been best friends straight after.

It was worse when we were younger but its not the same now were older. I think you learn to grow out of it.

Unread post by **Noog** » August 15th, 2005, 2:41 am

At first, I hated fighting, I just felt at the time that I had no choice. Then after doing it cos I felt I had too or loose face, I began to enjoy it of a kind. I got a buzz, a rush, an adrenaline hit. I thought I enjoyed fighting all my teens, when I stopped, I enjoyed not fighting more!!!

dkey · Unread post by **dkey** » August 15th, 2005, 7:06 am

i think its part of the growing up process, i ve friends who get into fights for some stupid reasons

Unread post by **Ice** » August 15th, 2005, 7:07 am

it depends on the kid, but at some point he will have to fight for one reason or another...so it's not really a bad thing if kids get into fights occasionally just to get a taste of what's goin on

Unread post by **Noog** » August 15th, 2005, 9:30 am

Agreed. I won my spurs. But I fought without knives and guns, I fought with my fists 'n head 'n feet. So I live to tell my tales. Thing is its all a right of passage and done the ol' school way, just 100% normality - but mix it with society gone wrong - and thats my endz today and more so and amplified on the streets of LA today and that right of passage becomes a dance of death, sadly. Fight on boys, but put yer guns away.

Unread post by **$outh$ide** » September 27th, 2005, 2:06 am

one of my teachers said a boy is more likely to violent/fight if he lives in a male household & one said if they lived in a female household because they have no father figure to look up to. i fight i dont go looking for it u no what i mean.
i started when me friend moved to my area because he & his bros n friends brawled all the time because of the area they were from & bought it with him thats how i started( i was 16)

Jakk · Unread post by **Jakk** » September 28th, 2005, 5:01 pm

NW10 wrote:Where i come from boys start fighting one another from a young age. when i was 9-10 i started fighting with other kids and it was on a daily basis, and this carried on until we were 17-18. Most fights were just to prove you were the hardest etc...

But fights settle all sorts of disputes and quarrels. On many a time my friends and i have fought over trivial things and been best friends straight after.

It was worse when we were younger but its not the same now were older. I think you learn to grow out of it.

well I never got into a fight till the age of 14 when I started at a ll boys school where if you didn't know how to stick up for your self you'd get the shit kicked out of yu or have to put up with lots of stick

Unread post by **Christina Marie** » October 13th, 2005, 9:34 am

I had all but forgot about this thread! Thanks gentlemen, you all have had some very insightful input. Thank heaven, my son seems to have passed through that "looking for trouble" stage. Not that he would'nt be more than ok to throw down if neccessary, he just does'nt go looking for it anymore and tries to avoid it if possible. And ya, his dad has really never been around, I have been very lucky that my sisters husband has been a terrific male role model and his grandfather as well, but still, thats not "dad". "Dad", has been in the pen on and off and is an a**hole big time, although I would never say as much to my son. TY!

Unread post by **sxr3no** » October 14th, 2005, 2:17 pm

There are two kind of teenagers in my opinion when it comes down to categorizing them into why do they get into fights.
There are those fools that like to fight to show off, to prove something, and because they want to defend the barrio but there are those other fools that are pure kick back, that dont really like to get into shit and so they only fight when is nessesary. I think thats the best thing to be, dont fight unless is a real good reason. I aint old and shit, I recognize I am still a youngster but I think that age doesnt matter when it comes down to being mature and walking away from a fight, but once I am in a fight I rather get my ass kicked than letting any one stop it. If we are gonna get down we are gonna get down real fucking good.

Unread post by **Christina Marie** » October 14th, 2005, 3:06 pm

sxr3no wrote:There are two kind of teenagers in my opinion when it comes down to categorizing them into why do they get into fights.
There are those fools that like to fight to show off, to prove something, and because they want to defend the barrio but there are those other fools that are pure kick back, that dont really like to get into shit and so they only fight when is nessesary. I think thats the best thing to be, dont fight unless is a real good reason. I aint old and shit, I recognize I am still a youngster but I think that age doesnt matter when it comes down to being mature and walking away from a fight, but once I am in a fight I rather get my ass kicked than letting any one stop it. If we are gonna get down we are gonna get down real #%@&#%@ good.

I don't know how young you are, but you have a real solid outlook on this issue. My son went through the "looking for fights" stage at 16-17 and it apparently was a phase. He is 19 now and has steadily shown me that he prefers not to fight if at all possible, but as you said, if it comes to the point that he has to get down, he can and does hold his own. Only been a couple times and he tried every viable option to avoid a physical altercation before proceeding to whoop some ass, lol!

Unread post by **sxr3no** » October 16th, 2005, 4:50 pm

Thats firme that he knows wuz up already, now I am the one who is trying to show my little brother wuz up... It aint easy.

Unread post by **Christina Marie** » October 17th, 2005, 10:05 am

sxr3no wrote:Thats firme that he knows wuz up already, now I am the one who is trying to show my little brother wuz up... It aint easy.

Good for you though recognizing that he needs you to be a role model and a teacher! Its been hard for me being a single mom to teach him how to be a man. he has had my sisters husband, who is a great man and my grandfather, but he passed away when my son was only 11. I think that alot of the lessons I have taught him are purely based in morals and ethics. That and he has a good head on his shoulders to begin with. In my opinion you are either born with a heart or not, so its instilled in a person by nature and can either be enhanced or destroyed by many elements.

crewster8323 · Unread post by **crewster8323** » November 1st, 2005, 2:19 am

when i was younger around my early teens, i always loved to fight. Just that adreline rush and to build respect on the homeboys down in the school i go to. now, as i got older and been locked up once. i realized that fighting isn't worth it. there are some people in thsi world who can't take a ass beating and will shoot you. sometimes, it's good to avoid than to throw it down.

Unread post by **Noog** » November 2nd, 2005, 10:07 am

Thats right. In my endz, if a youth has a pop at me, I look at him and believe I could drop him, but realise that too many people carry - usually knives in these endz, but guns too. So even if I could drop a boy troubling me, I 'allow it' - those boys wont do old school and I'm not up for a knife in my chest or a bullet in my guts!

MiChuhSuh · Unread post by **MiChuhSuh** » May 12th, 2006, 7:54 pm

Christina Marie wrote:Is this a "normal" stage that teenage boy's go through? I wan't to hear all you're opinion's and view's.

Yes, and it's not just teenage boys and sometimes the "normal" stage lasts so long one has to wonder why this stage keeps dragging on.

If you know what EVN stands for I chose this name because I can't stop getting into fights myself. It's the opposite - I'm not trying to preach here I'm trying to find to source of it to get rid of it inside myself.

I honestly can't remember a point in my life when I wasn't fighting, and not just normal stuff either. Like when I was 15 moved in with my dad I would get in fights with him even when I was just a punk kid so he could easily beat me down but I just kept going.

Honestly it's a normal phase, but make sure your kid has an "end" to this phase, or else it'll come back to haunt him like it is to me.

I tried "channeling" this into hard training more boxing and martial arts and stuff but even then it's hard. I can say that it's given me envergy for training, but now that I'm not getting in physical fights I'm getting into mental and verbal fights at home, work, with not just random people or "enemies" but even friends and family and stuff. I basically feel like an addict to fights. Sometimes for no reason I just have to do something so I punch a heavy bag for a few hours and then I realize I still don't feel
any better but I only stop because my body can't go farther.

I forgot the name of the movie but there's this movie about two brothers one is black and one is white and they had a screwed up dad so one of them get violent and kills him and the other becomes a drug addict. That's basically how I feel, the violent one.

Ya I know I'm "b*tching on the internet" like Peron and youngwun said but whatever. If anyone can make a recommendation I would really appreciate that.

MiChuhSuh · Unread post by **MiChuhSuh** » May 12th, 2006, 7:58 pm

Just as an apology basically all my posts are here are arguing... mostly trivial and unecassary arguments.

So to everyone I put out unjustified hate to... sorry.

It's like not even a second instinct but a first instinct in me at this point. So I'm gonna try to avoid anything that could possibly lead to this thinking for now, but if anyone has a suggestion please post it here or pm me.

Unread post by **Christina Marie** » May 12th, 2006, 8:34 pm

I had totally forgot about this thread...lol. An update, my son has been out of this phase since right after I posted this topic. Thank heaven...I was getting worried he might end up going to jail over some stupid ish.

Unread post by **Old Shatterhand** » May 12th, 2006, 10:13 pm

EVN - I'm just me... wrote:
Christina Marie wrote:Is this a "normal" stage that teenage boy's go through? I wan't to hear all you're opinion's and view's.
Yes, and it's not just teenage boys and sometimes the "normal" stage lasts so long one has to wonder why this stage keeps dragging on.

If you know what EVN stands for I chose this name because I can't stop getting into fights myself. It's the opposite - I'm not trying to preach here I'm trying to find to source of it to get rid of it inside myself.

I honestly can't remember a point in my life when I wasn't fighting, and not just normal stuff either. Like when I was 15 moved in with my dad I would get in fights with him even when I was just a punk kid so he could easily beat me down but I just kept going.

Honestly it's a normal phase, but make sure your kid has an "end" to this phase, or else it'll come back to haunt him like it is to me.

I tried "channeling" this into hard training more boxing and martial arts and stuff but even then it's hard. I can say that it's given me envergy for training, but now that I'm not getting in physical fights I'm getting into mental and verbal fights at home, work, with not just random people or "enemies" but even friends and family and stuff. I basically feel like an addict to fights. Sometimes for no reason I just have to do something so I punch a heavy bag for a few hours and then I realize I still don't feel
any better but I only stop because my body can't go farther.

I forgot the name of the movie but there's this movie about two brothers one is black and one is white and they had a screwed up dad so one of them get violent and kills him and the other becomes a drug addict. That's basically how I feel, the violent one.

Ya I know I'm "b*tching on the internet" like Peron and youngwun said but whatever. If anyone can make a recommendation I would really appreciate that.

I have had some friends like you EVN. My favorite friend like that was a giant 1/2 Irish 1/2 Sicilian from Chicago. Loved that crazy guy and I had his back. Intelligent, funny, tough, etc... He had to obtain more self-control and patience. You have excellent attributes many of which I respect. We can all use more though right? Self-control and patience don't come easy to some people but it certainly can. I've seen people overcome all sorts of anger problems over the years. The problem is rooted in the "flesh". I might get back at you with some advice on this later. Let me think about it some more. Peace.

And just a reminder to everyone that this is a public forum without an edit button please think before you post so you don't incriminate yourselves. Peace and God bless.

Unread post by **$outhPhillypuppet** » May 17th, 2006, 12:33 am

alot of the time when you meet a kid that fights alot there is always a hype man behind him.

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Do teenage boys like getting in fights?

Do teenage boys like getting in fights?

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